Sexual Innuendo Game Screenshots – The Return

It’s been a while since I wrote anything intentionally childish and puerile – so here I am again with another dose of Sexual Innuendo Game Screenshots. If you missed the first part of Sexual Innuendo Game Screenshots, then you can find it here. I hope you all agree that they are extremely funny, and perfectly befitting a fine, up-standing videogames website like Rice Digital.

 

True, when I originally collected the first batch of Sexual Innuendo Game Screenshots, Rice Digital wasn’t quite as fine and upstanding as it is now. Back in the ‘good old days’ they’d let me post lewd Pokemon cosplay galleries and even write some EROTIC POETRY. If you can consider Ash Ketchum bursting in on his mum and Professor Oak getting it on, ‘poetry’.

 

I actually wrote loads of sexy Sonic the Hedgehog poems – but Rice Digital’s Editor Oscar Taylor-Kent, told me I had delete them before he phoned the police. But then, what does he know?

 

Anyway, er… that went off on an unexpected tangent. Let’s get down to the sordid, but thoroughly amusing business of Sexual Innuendo Game Screenshots, shall we?!

 

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See, kids. This is why you should never venture into the woods with strangers.

 

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When you put it like that, I’m almost tempted to taste it for myself. Almost.

 

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I always enjoy the company of women who know what they like, and aren’t afraid to ask for it.

 

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Fresh from the Animal Crossing book of works-every-time pick up lines.

 

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Just like Pokemon before it, Animal Crossing is legendary when it comes to unintentional sexual innuendo game screenshots.

 

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Now there’s an offer I can’t refuse.

 

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I’m not sure what’s more terrifying, Nigel (yes, that’s his name) getting his crotch examined by a chicken… OR THE CREEPY FUCKING BEAR HIDING AROUND THE CORNER.

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Great to see that ChronoTrigger was progressive in more ways than one…

 

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Not going to lie. It’s been… it’s been a while.

 

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It is always important to clarify the.. er… rules of engagement before embarking on an new relationship.

 

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Eagle eyed fans will know this is basically the same screenshot as the last batch of sexual innuendo game sceenshots – but with a different caption. Who knew that one simple scene could deliver SO MUCH innuendo gold?!

 

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Which is a perfectly valid reason not to get into an elevator with a stranger.
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There comes a time in every girl’s life where, alone in her bedroom, a journey of self discovery ends in a climax of… weird giggling…

 

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If I ever caught one of my mates ‘polishing my sisters stone’, I can pretty much guarantee I would not be thanking them. I mean, I’m sure she’s had her stone polished by a whole bunch of guys throughout her life, and that’s fine – but its not something I want my face rubbed in.  NO, WAIT,  I didn’t mean… ugh, forget it. You people are just the worst.

 

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It’s always good to divulge this kind of information when you’re adventuring with friends. Sometimes it gets cold out there – and the nights can be lonely.

 

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It depends on the situation, but I can confirm that, when I’ve closed my eyes, nine times out of ten, the fun doubles.

 

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Okay, you tell Cliff to STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM MY HORSES.

 

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From Link, we would expect nothing less.

 

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In front of an old woman and child?! Disgusting.

 

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To be honest, I’ve never really needed much in the way incentivising… but thanks all the same.

 

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When I find a girl who’s happy to be alone with me in the same room for more that half an hour without rolling her eyes in thinly veiled contempt, I am totally using this.

 

 

 

Aaaaand on that note, I think we’re done for Sexual Innuendo Game Screenshots for another year. As a ‘fun’ bonus game – the first person to name all 20 games in the comments below will forever win my utmost respect. It will also make you look super rad to all your ‘friends’ on Disqus, so there’s that too.

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